The Hated Hiker

 

11-9-2022

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I woke up to a perfect Texan autumn morning – warm, with a subtle cool breeze just strong enough to keep you from sweating. The perfect weather for another long day of hiking!

Jane and I puttered up to the Chisos Mountain Visitor Center and I plopped her in their parking lot to be admired, while I hit the trail again. Today’s goal: Emory Peak!

Almost all of the Chisos Mountains trails start from the same trailhead, so I found myself on a familiar path, retracing my steps from a couple days prior. Instead of heading up the Laguna Meadows trail, though, I headed up the Pinnacles trail, effectively going in the reverse of my earlier trek.

Very unfortunately, the Pinnacles trail is much steeper than Laguna Meadows, and it doesn’t let up for miles. I slogged on up through the sloped brushy foothills, up through the rocky forest, up through the endless steep switchbacks (which were even unpleasant to go down two days ago, so you can imagine how unpleasant they were to go up), up, up, up. I would pause at every turn of the switchbacks to have a bit of a breather, then steam up the straightaway to just get it out of the way. Whether or not that was a good technique… well, I did get to the crest of the trail in a reasonable time, so I guess it worked out for me.

 

Not pictured: terrible switchbacks

After nearly four miles of trudging uphill, I reached the crest of the trail, at a saddle between Emory Peak and another peak. I sat and had a bag of grapes to replenish some juice. Some Mexican Jays gathered around me hoping for a handout, but no dice from me!

 

Cute

My snack finished, I took off on the trail up to Emory Peak. Fortunately, this portion was a much more gentle grade – at least, in comparison to the earlier steep switchbacks – so I made great time. And once I broke out of the trees, the views were phenomenal!

 

Boot extra-prominent here

As I headed up, I saw a group of hikers in the distance, silhouetted against the sky further up the ridge. As I watched, they pulled out a bunch of flags – of unknown origin – and jumped about, waving them around enthusiastically. Maybe a quick pump-up pep rally? Who knows. They certainly weren’t at the top, although they were at what appeared to be a very nice overlook.

 

Also, there were nice flowers in the trail

With the warm sun, the light breeze, and the low-ish grade on the trail, I was really hoofing it. And about a quarter mile before the summit of the peak, I caught up with that gaggle of hikers, finding that it was a group of six or so boisterous middle-aged friends - all carrying Texas flags prominently -  making their way up to the peak. A few were struggling a bit over the bouldery trail, but I was moving fast. And then… I had what might have been the funniest exchange on a trail that I have ever had.

As I came up behind the rearmost member of their party, one heard me turn a rock over and looked backwards. She turned to call forwards to the rest of her party, “Hiker back!! And it’s a young one, moving fast!”

The woman in front of her then turned back, caught sight of me, and said, “Ohhh it’s Mustang Sally!”

Without missing a beat, the woman in front of HER then said, “Ooooooooh we HATEEEEE her!!”

I laughed pretty hard at that one. Never had that reaction to my car or my hiking speed before!

They were (mostly) joking, but I still felt the need to reply, “If it’s any consolation, I’m a career geologist and they fire me if I can’t hike up a mountain in less than five hours”

Which then, of course, led to the rest of the group stopping, clamoring with questions about geology. I evaded the questions neatly with a flippant, “Oh, I’m one of those sages, I can only answer geology questions at the top of the mountain,” and legged it off before they could stop me for too long.

In short order, I made it up to the summit – well, not quite the summit, as I didn’t rock climb my way up the final 10 feet of rock, but I’d still consider it close enough – and had a nice lunch and a bit of a nap after looking around a bit. The view from the top of Emory Peak is pretty amazing on a clear day! It’s easy to see clear into Mexico from here, and there’s all kinds of neat mountains and other geologic features to look at.

 

The view from the slot between the two "peaks" (rock outcrops) at the top of Emory

A hell of a view!

A shot of someone climbing up to the very top of Emory's rocky spire. I only went partway up before stopping for lunch on a good boulder

Picturesque in the extreme

Of course, eventually the other group caught up to me, and rightly declared that since I was now at the top of the mountain, I was required to answer their questions. I told them that I was a “soft rocks” geologist (limestone is considered a “soft rock”; volcanics are not!) so I wouldn’t know much about the volcanic rocks of the region. But somehow, for all of the questions they posed, I did have an answer. One of them pointed this out to me – “You said you only know about soft rocks, but you answered all of our questions!!” – to which I replied, “Yes, because all of your questions are answered on the road signs around the park, and I’ve read all the signs.” We all had a good laugh at that one. Sometimes it pays to be the kind of person who compulsively visits ALL of the exhibits, even the little signs on the sides of the road!

I left the summit and hiked back down, glad to finally not be going uphill anymore. It turns out that I took almost the exact same photos going down as I did up, so I guess I didn’t miss any of the good views!

 

Hmm, starting to look suspiciously identical...

I arrived back at the parking lot early in the afternoon, with plenty of daylight left to burn. I had hiked the 11 mile out-and-back trail in a little over 5 hours – like I said, I was making great time considering the grade of the first part of the hike! I think that the South Rim hike kickstarted me into heavy hiking mode, making all other trails seem pretty short. It’s nice to know that I’ve still “got it”, despite having lived in “the flatlands” of Texas for seven years now. The altitude resilience and the hiking fortitude instilled in me during my time living in Colorado has yet to wear off, it seems.

I thought about heading up to the Lost Mine trailhead again to take a stab at parking, but the awesome patio (and brownie) at the Chisos Mountain Lodge was calling my name again. So I plopped myself down at a table there to hang out for a couple hours. Fortunately I had thought to bring my book with me up to the lodge, so I had something to occupy me between long periods of staring into the mountains. I’m getting better at this whole “relaxing” thing.

As dusk fell, I piled myself and all my books and backpacks and various items back into Jane – noting that the rearview mirror had finally broken after detaching itself from the frame daily for the past two years – and headed back to camp. The mirror is a problem for non-vacation Kelly! For now, my problem is how many burgers I should eat for dinner tonight. And how to address my apparent notoriety in the Chisos Mountain region of Big Bend. "The Hated Hiker", indeed.  

Kelly signing out.